Happy Tuesday y’all! I think it’s such a cool thing to be a beginner and to put yourself out there but the amount of doubt that you end up facing is tremendous and it certainly takes a while to get that confidence. Hell some people don’t actually end up gaining it because it’s a slow process. When I began blogging I was always so scared to share my personal experiences and say almost everything but it’s changed a lot. Someone emailed me a while back and asked me to do a follow up on my blog post about my first day in an American school and I feel horrible because I absolutely forgot. Here’s one for you and I’m sorry that I forgot about this! So in case you missed my first blog post about this here it goes!http://www.justimani.com/my-first-day-in-an-american-school/
I guess this is a follow up of the rest of the year cause nothing much happened on the second day. When people ask me how my high school experience here was I almost always say that it was the worst thing and I would not, even for a million dollars, go back. That’s a total lie who am I kidding you know I’d take the money. Bottom line is that it wasn’t a horrible as I always made it sound. Of course the first entire year was hard but after that it got a little easier maybe a lot easier? So the first year I was absolutely lost, literally lost I did not know what was around me or who was around me. I found what all these American kids did absolutely strange it’s just a cultural thing. They were the hardest to try make friends with because they had all these groups going on and being a kid that just showed up I wanted so bad to be part of something. A lot of them would tell you lets get coffee or something and they never actually would get coffee with you. It was a formality and God did I hate it so much! I feel like it’s a Minnesotan thing too to just be nice but not show your real feelings or intentions. They were nice and that’s great but I couldn’t make strong connections which means I had no friends at all of the first semester. Second semester I met this amazing Vietnamese girl who ended up being my best friend, we had each others backs cause we were both new and harbored a gentle dislike for all these kids. We had classes together and it made life so much easier, in case you’re still wondering we’re still in touch. I did end up meeting a lot of people in my senior year and a lot of them were foreign kids and we understood each other so we stayed together. I’d finally found a community and it was everything I hoped for!
My worst class had to be my literature class where I sat and wanted to melt into my chair the entire time. I never knew the right things to say, I felt incompetent, I was constantly nervous and would literally die inside when I got picked on to answer something. I got through it with a lot of fake confidence but I was cringing inside and never told anyone about this. I hated that class so much, dreaded it actually. I also realize that this story needs to be continued in another blog post because I have so much more to share about my experiences so stay tuned for part 3!
Thanks for tuning in!
Faith Jassam x.