It all started the midnight of my 20th birthday

I had this beautiful idea of what my 20-year-old self should be. In my head she was a boss ass, she was  brave, she was beautiful, smart, had her shit together, she was accomplished and always looked flawless. Ten seconds before midnight of my birthday: I swore that the world was about to hear about my greatness in 10 seconds and I waited. The 10 second countdown to greatness began and 5,4,3,2,1….crickets.  I almost felt it twenty seconds in though, you know the huge, loud, heavy slap of adulthood. I just sat in the dark dazed, a little confused, still the same dusty ass, broke, not anything close to flawless human I was at 19. Two months in I’m still in the same spot sipping my coffee, letting life happen but having no idea what to do. I’m supposed to have it  figured out or so I think I do but most definitely DO NOT.  I’m supposed to have a five-year plan to move to New York and start my career and be successful like all the amazing entrepreneurs I look up to. This world is rough. I turned twenty and instead of having a sense of direction and a pat on the back for keeping myself alive to see my twenties, I got a cold hard slap across my face “welcome to adulthood bitch!”

I feel like there’s a crazy amount of pressure for twenty year olds to make it big and ‘figure it all out’ as soon as we hit twenty. SO were all racking our brains to find next thing that will make us turn into overnight successes. DO not get me wrong, I appreciate the pressure at times because it makes some people achieve their greatest potential. On the other hand, I love a good journey and even better a good story and I appreciate growing with time. I feel like these days success is measured by how quickly we attain it but I don’t think it should be that way. I wish our culture still fully embraced the power of a journey and what journeys do to shape young people. I wish there wasn’t so much pressure to be the next youngest promoted person, the first black person to be something big, the next person to start a product line or be the next Sophia Amoruso. Then again we live in such competitive times that this pressure is inevitable. But is it a good thing or a bad thing? Makes me wonder just how much worse it’s about to get considering I just hit twenty. All I have to say is Good luck on your twenty somethings you need it and so do I.

Love, Imani.